This is the place where I live.
It is Prague in case you don’t know. Nice city.
I wish I came here sooner you see… I’m not from around here but I feel like nobody I know is really from here.
What does it even mean ‘to be from a place’ to be “lost and found”?
Rent a flat for 25 years makes you a local? Or maybe being born in one of the maternities makes you one? It has to be this otherwise it won’t make sense. But on the other hand you can be born in a place and spend your teenage years there and after school you fly away and never come back. That should remove the local tag from your head I think.
You don’t belong here anymore, you were just passing by, a foreigner.
Long time ago, about 22 years ago , I went with my mom in a trip across Europe arriving in one of our stops to beautiful Prague.
I specifically remember thinking ‘this is a place where I will spend my life’ and You know that sometimes when you like something you tend to idolize it to extreme ( like I did with Sweden) but this time it was very unique to me because it was without feelings. It was more like a total certainty ( like knowing your name) that I said it.
Initially i didn’t even like it so much, whatever just another city with a bridge.
That turned out to be true and somehow my steps carried me years later here.
So where am I exactly? Am I lost and found?
I don’t know if I am lost and found. Is this the place where i will spend majority of my life? Make it a home?
I have a house but is that a home? Houses are meaningless these days since you anyway have to pay the bank for it so it looks like a rent with bank the landlord.
We have freedom to move but we still choose to stay. Even when we are young we still get comfy and don’t move very far from home ( or at least what we think home is).
Others of course travel the seas in Australia, Asia in search for their home or escape from home. What about these people? Are they also lost? Or maybe traveling itself is a home.
An Airbnb here, a couch-surfing there, hotel over here.
I was thinking that being lost is not a physical place that you cannot find but uncertainty is the issue.
You can feel like home in a foreign place and where you grew up feel like 1000 miles away.
If you ever feel lost or undecided or alone or god knows what just think about blind people who were not blind from birth.
They had something extremely precious ‘their sight’ and forever lost it.
It may seem like the ultimate ‘get lost’ situation since they will never see their home again but you know what?
They learn to experience the other sides of their life which until then were neglected and still move on forward.
True that you won’t be able to see faces or watch a sunset but you can focus on listening to audiobooks or music, you can play musical instruments, use your hands to create something , speak with people etc.
They can be lost seeing from our point of view but they know exactly where they are, they may be even more present and aware of their home than all of us.
Now , don’t get sad or depressed.
You can find yourself/home no matter if right now you think you are on the wrong track.
I learned from a very cool book ( about which I will speak later) that if you know what you want and work for it every day just a little bit, you will get it faster than if you dedicate all your time at once.
No matter where you are take a small step every day in the direction you want and keep at it no matter what.
Personally I think it was those tiny little steps cumulated and pushing me forward.
Cheers and thank you for reading TheLongWalks